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Wedding Rehearsal Dinner: Rehearsal Dinner Toasting Etiquette?

Q.

I am curious about rehearsal dinner toast etiquette. I am the groom and would prefer not to have to say anything to the group en masse if I am not obliged (I have enough to worry about already!). Does the bride generally make a toast nowadays? Also, even if the bride and groom are not obliged to speak, does the obligation arise once others start making toasts at either event?

A.

Here's the deal with rehearsal dinner toasting. It does vary, but chances are some people will toast you: your parents, the best man, and good friends. When you are toasted, you should definitely rise in thanks, and perhaps make a toast in return -- to your bride, to your parents, to both sets of parents, and so on. (The bride may also make a toast if she likes.) But because since you're having a pretty intimate dinner, you probably won't get away with saying nothing. Don't stress out about it though. You don't have to say anything earth shattering -- just say thank you to whomever toasted you, tell your fiance you love her and can't wait for your day to begin, and thank your parents for all they've done for you. You know the drill! The rehearsal dinner really is traditionally the groom's and his parent's thing, so you can't just fade into the woodwork. And if you get nervous, just remember -- it's the best man who's expected to be witty, not you!

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