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Wedding Rehearsal Dinner: Do I Invite Fiance's Parents if They Won't Pay for Rehearsal Dinner?

Q.

My fiance's family either has no idea they are supposed to host a rehearsal dinner or they just don't care! My parents can't afford to host (they are already shelling out big bucks for me, so I won't ask for more), but they suggested I have everyone come to my house and have it catered (my fiance and I will pay for it). Aside from their ignorance of wedding customs, my fiance's divorced parents hate each other. Would it be really awful if I did not invite them to the rehearsal dinner?

A.

Though it's understandable that you're stressed, yes, it would be awful not to invite them. Remember, no matter who they are or what they're like, they are your soon-to-be in-laws. No matter how horrible you think they'll act, you still want to start off on the right foot by inviting them to this party. Trust us, there will be more trouble if you don't invite them than if you do and then have to grin and bear it.

It's true that his parents may not even realize they're supposed to host the rehearsal dinner -- so it's up to you and your fiance to decide whether you want to bring it up with them or just host something yourselves. The fact that they're divorced and don't get along may make asking them to take care of it more trouble than it's worth. Remember, too, that the rehearsal dinner doesn't have to be a big to-do -- it can be as simple as a home pizza party or burgers on the backyard grill. Don't put a ton of expectations on it -- or on them. Just look at the dinner as a way to kick back before the wedding, and concentrate on your family, your fiance, and your wedding party rather than dwelling on what his parents might do at the event. It will be fine, as long as you don't make it into a bigger deal than it has to be.

See More: Rehearsals + Brunches , Rehearsal Dinner