Wedding Invitations: Addressing Them

To a Married  Couple

Even if you aren't close with both members of the couple, you still need to include both names on the outer envelope. Guests rely on the outer envelope to determine who exactly is invited. For example:

Mr. John and Mrs. Samantha Holt

Or

Mr. and Mrs. John Holt
1234 Benoit Road
Plano, Texas 75023

On the inner envelope, lose the first names or the titles and last names if you're very close with the couple:

Mr. and Mrs. Holt

Or

John and Samantha

To a Married Couple Uses Different Last Names

List the person you're closest with first on the outer and inner envelope. If you're similarly acquainted with both, list them in alphabetical order.

Mr. John Holt and Mrs. Samantha Thuente

To an Unmarried Couple Living Together

Like a married couple, both names should be included on the envelope, but in this case, each name gets its own line.

Mr. Joseph Hirsch
Ms. Rebecca Strecker
1234 Benoit Road
Plano, Texas 75023

Again, go for alphabetical order if you know the couple well. If you're primarily friends with only one member of the couple, it's completely acceptable to address the outer envelope to that person and include "and Guest" or that person's name on the inner envelope:

Mr. Hirsch and Ms. Strecker

Or

Mr. Hirsch and Guest

To a Same-Sex Couple

Use the same rules as you would for any other unmarried or married couple. If the couple is married or lives together, list them on the same line:

Ms. Celine Elgin and Ms. Jacqueline Purcell

Or simply list their full names on the same line without titles.

Celine Elgin and Jacqueline Purcell

On the inner envelope, use titles and last names:

Ms. Elgin and Ms. Purcell

Or you can skip titles and simply address it to their first names.

To a Married Woman Doctor or Two Married Doctors

If a woman uses her maiden name professionally and socially, the outer envelope should read:

Dr. Anne Barker and Mr. Peter Underwood

Or, if she uses her husband's name socially:

Dr. Anne and Mr. Peter Underwood

If both parties are doctors, you can address the outer envelope:

The Drs. Underwood

Or

Drs. Anne and Peter Underwood

The same format is followed for other distinguished titles, such as reverend and honorable.

To Children and Families

Younger guests can be included on the inner envelope of their parents' invitation by their name(s) or "and Family" -- although the latter is easier to misinterpret.

Mr. and Mrs. Michael Abraham
Daniel, Jeffrey, Brittany, and Kelly

Or

Mr. and Mrs. Michael Abraham and Family

To Children 18 and Older

They should receive their own invitations, although siblings over 18 can be sent a joint invitation, in which case the outer envelope should include their names alphabetically on individual lines:

Miss Audrey Abraham
Miss Lily Abraham
Mr. Jack Abraham

If you don't include "and Family" or each child's name, you're implying that children are not invited. That said, don't be surprised if some guests still mistakenly assume their children are welcome. If you're concerned this will happen with your guests, ask your immediate family and bridal party to help spread the word that the wedding will be adults-only. In the end, you may have to follow up with guests who don't get the message via phone to gently explain the situation.

-- Hagar Scher

See More: Wedding Invitations + Wedding Stationery