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Flower Girls: Flower Girl Duties in Detail

Cute as a button, but not without some dos and don'ts. Here's the nitty gritty.

Photo: Jasper-Sky Photography International

What's the flower girl's primary role? To be darling, of course. But rosy cheeks and ribbons aside, her cruise down the aisle is no small feat. Having a flower girl is optional, but it's a nice way to make a favorite little person feel a part of it all. Here's an explanation of her role and tips to help make it easy.

  • The flower girl, usually an adorable little lady aged three to eight, proceeds down the aisle just before the maid of honor, scattering rose petals along the bridal path. She follows the ring bearer (if there is one), and sometimes she will even precede the bride. Traditionally, she totes a basket full of petals, but other alternatives include wrapped candies or confetti. Also, instead of scattering aforementioned items, she can carry a single bloom, a pomander (a lush ball of flowers), or blow bubbles.
  • Never underestimate the power of the buddy system. We love the idea of having two flower girls or pairing up ring bearer and flower girl so that they can proceed together, side by side. Partnering will give them added confidence.
  • If some bridesmaids are skittish about the processional, then the flower girl is definitely going to be a little spooked. To communicate the importance of her role, while minimizing the pressure, the bride should explain the flower girl's duties to her well in advance. The parents should follow up with pep talks and rehearsals.
  • If possible, arrange to have the flower girl attend the shower and/or the bridesmaids' lunch (if the bride is having one) to boost her comfort level around the other (bigger) bridal attendants. Seeing friendly, familiar faces on the big day will help to ease any anxiety.
  • Seat the flower girl's parents toward the front of the ceremony so she can focus on them and be encouraged by their smiles of reassurance. The very young flower girl should sit with her parents after she walks; poised little ladies may stand at the altar with the other bridal attendants.
  • Flower girls aren't limited to wearing mini replicas of the bride's dress. Tea-length white dresses with a bonnet or satin bow are standard and sweet, but there are many little-girl looks to choose from.
  • Keep in mind that having children in the ceremony means there's only so much one can control. Rest assured that whatever the flower girl does (cries, drops the basket, lifts up her dress...), her personality and preciousness will make the guests smile.
  • tip

    To communicate the importance of her role, while minimizing the pressure, the bride should explain the flower girl's duties to her well in advance.


-- The Knot

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