Is the guy supposed to include the girl when selecting an engagement ring, or is she supposed to be surprised?
It's a long-standing tradition that the guy chooses the ring he thinks is perfect for his gal, then surprises her by popping the question. Historically, that's just "the way it was done." But let's talk reality for a second. This is a ring the bride will wear for a long, long time, so she'd better like it. What could be worse than watching her open the box and say "Oh", because it's not quite what she really wanted? There's nothing wrong with the bride letting the groom in on the style of diamond she thinks is coolest (even if it's just the shape she prefers; you can always change the setting). Let's face it -- a guy wants to see his sweetie's face light up when she sees he's chosen the perfect ring, but he can't be expected to read her mind. So pointing him in the right direction will make everyone happy. On the flip side, if a girl would rather select the exact ring she wants, these days that's totally acceptable, too.
Popping the Question